Saturday, October 29, 2011

Freaky Friday

Usually this is where a fortune card or saying is featured. This Friday (or Saturday for many folk at the time of this post) will instead showcase a saying from someone we've all heard from quite a bit in the past few weeks. Enjoy!


"The Sky is dark. The fire Burns. You strive in vain, as fate's wheel turns."

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Hoarders: Azeroth Edition - Bring Me The Head Of...Oh Wait

Happy Thursday hoarders! It is time for a week long overdue Hoarders post. What is this week's topic all about? Well, if you haven't guessed it by now, it's all about witches, pumpkins, and the Headless Horseman himself. That's right, this week's post is all about Hallow's End.


Hallow's End in Azeroth is that special time of year when the Headless Horseman comes out of hiding to plague us all with fire and his rhythmic rhymes. This year is no different, though this time around we have new ways of getting out Masks for all Occasions achievement, new pets and items, and actual currency to buy our missing items with (masks, that damn cloth pumpkin helm, and the Sinister Squashling). What all can you add to your collection this year? Well read on down the list and see what you're missing.



Title
The Hallowed


Mount(s)
The Horseman's Reins - This item can be found in a Loot-Filled Pumpkin, which you get for killing the Headless Horseman via the Looking For Dungeon tool once daily (.4% drop rate). Very sinister and slick looking horse model mount. It even flies!

Magic Broom - Want to scoot around on a broom like the Wicked Witch of the West? This item can be found in a Loot-Filled Pumpkin, which you get for killing the Headless Horseman via the Looking For Dungeon tool once daily, or gained from a Crudely Wrapped Gift received when you successfully put out the fires in starting zone villages, to be completed once daily. If your RNG sucks you can purchase one from Chub and Dorothy for 150 Tricky Treats but beware, this item only lasts for the duration of the Hallow's End festival. Any other ride-able broom to be found in game suffers the same, sad fate.


Currency
Tricky Treat - Collect these from Hallow's End related quests and dailies. This item can be found in a Loot-Filled Pumpkin, which you get for killing the Headless Horseman via the Looking For Dungeon tool once daily. It is also contained in a Handful of Treats. Handful of Treats is gathered from the candy buckets located in various inns around Azeroth and Outland


Pet(s)
Feline Familiar - May be purchased from Chub and Dorothy for 150 Tricky Treats. Cute little black cat pet that sports a witch's hat. It will even mount up on its own broom when you hop onto a flying mount!

Creepy Crate - This is a crate. Not any ordinary crate however, oh no. This crate is CREEPY MAN. It burps out smoke and causes little animals to mysteriously disappear. If you'd like a Creepy Crate of your own, simply start the questline with Missing Heirlooms (A)/Missing Heirlooms (H) and follow it to the end.


Gear
Hallowed Helm - Required for the achievement Sinister Calling. Often found in a Loot-Filled Pumpkin, which you get for killing the Headless Horseman via the Looking For Dungeon tool once daily (36% drop rate). It is often also contained in a Handful of Treats. Handful of Treats is gathered from the candy buckets located in various inns around Azeroth and Outland (5% drop rate). May also be found in the Crudely Wrapped Gift received when you successfully put out the fires in starting zone villages, to be completed once daily (.08% drop rate). If your RNG luck is completely dismal, you may purchase this helm from Chub and Dorothy for 150 Tricky Treats.

The Horseman's Horrific Helmet - Drops from the Loot-Filled Pumpkin, which you get for killing the Headless Horseman via the Looking For Dungeon tool once daily (3% drop rate).

Band of Ghoulish Glee - Agility ring (23%)
Seal of the Petrified Pumpkin - Strength ring (23%)
The Horseman's Signet - Hit caster ring (23%)
Wicked Witch's Ring - Spirit caster ring (23%)

Rings all drop from the Headless Horseman himself upon his defeat. It is possible to repeatedly farm him for these items. While these items are unique, you may wear The Horseman's Signet and Wicked Witch's Ring together.


Fun Items
Penny Pouch - Has a .01% chance to drop from the Headless Horseman himself according to Wowhead.com, but is often contained in a Handful of Treats. Handful of Treats is gathered from the candy buckets located in various inns around Azeroth and Outland.

Tooth Pick - Required for That Sparkling Smile. Drops from Handful of Treats, or if you have terrible RNG luck you may purchase this item from Chub and Dorothy for 2 Tricky Treats.

Weighted Jack-o'-Lantern - Needed for the achievement Check Your Head. Reward from the quests "Let the Fires Come!" and Stop the Fires! Also can be gained from a Crudely Wrapped Gift and from looting the Headless Horseman's corpse (40% drop). Can be used all year 'round. Have fun plaguing your friends with the plopping pumpkins onto their heads!


Wands
Wands needed for the achievement The Masquerade. In the event that all of the wands that are needed haven't been received through various Handful of Treats drops, they may be purchased from Darla and Stymie for 2 Tricky Treats a piece. Group up with a friend and have them zap you (or you may zap them) with the following:

Bat, Ghost, Leper Gnome, Ninja, Pirate, Random*, Skeleton, Wisp

*The "Random" wand does not need to be used to complete the achievement.


Masks
You must collect 24 different masks for the achievement A Mask for All Occasions and The Mask Task. Each mask has a random drop chance from Handful of Treats, which are gathered from the candy buckets located in various inns around Azeroth and Outland. They may also be found in a Loot-Filled Pumpkin, which you get for killing the Headless Horseman via the Looking for Dungeon tool once daily. If your RNG luck is particularly horrible for a few of the masks, you may purchase them from Farina and Spanky for 2 Tricky Treats a piece.

See A Mask for All Occasions for the complete list of masks necessary for the achievement. Yes I'm being lazy and not linking all 24 separate masks.

Buff Masks - These are new and may be purchased from Farina and Spanky for 5 Tricky Treats a piece.
Murloc Female Mask/Murloc Male Mask - Agility boost
Naga Female Mask/Naga Male Mask - Intellect boost
Ogre Female Mask/Ogre Male Mask - Stamina boost
Vrykul Female Mask/Vrykul Male Mask - Strength boost


Achievements
Hallowed Be Thy Name/Hallowed Be Thy Name - Part of the What A Long, Strange Trip It's Been meta achievement.

A Mask for All Occasions
Bring Me the Head of...Oh Wait
Check Your Head
G.N.E.R.D. Rage
Out With It
Rotten Hallow
Sinister Calling
The Mask Task
The Masquerade
The Savior of Hallow's End
That Sparkling Smile
Trick or Treat!
Tricks and Treats of Azeroth

Tricks and Treats of Northrend (A)/Tricks and Treats of Northrend (H)
Tricks and Treats of Cataclysm (A)/Tricks and Treats of Cataclysm (H)


Buff Items/Candies
Chewy Fel Taffy - Once a buff food, now just something to make you look "wicked." Sold by Farina and Spanky for 2 Tricky Treats a piece and has a random drop chance from Handful of Treats, which are gathered from the candy buckets located in various inns around Azeroth and Outland.

G.N.E.R.D.S. - Once a buff food, now just something to make you look "intelligent." Sold by Farina and Spanky for 2 Tricky Treats a piece and has a random drop chance from Handful of Treats, which are gathered from the candy buckets located in various inns around Azeroth and Outland. Still required for the achievement G.N.E.R.D. Rage.

Pyroblast Cinnamon Ball - Once a buff food, now just something to make you look "hot." Sold by Farina and Spanky for 2 Tricky Treats a piece and has a random drop chance from Handful of Treats, which are gathered from the candy buckets located in various inns around Azeroth and Outland.

Soothing Spearmint Candy - Once a buff food, now just something to make you look "cool." Sold by Farina and Spanky for 2 Tricky Treats a piece and has a random drop chance from Handful of Treats, which are gathered from the candy buckets located in various inns around Azeroth and Outland.



And that is more or less all of the available goodies for this holiday folks. If you haven't started looking for that Halloween costume for your favorite character or began your journey across Azeroth in search of those oh so tricky treats, I suggest you get a move on. Hallow's End finishes up this coming Monday, October 31st. Time is getting short, so get to hoarding!

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

The Wickerman

Little Sally Sue never wanted to be a warlock. What her dream was to be a witch, flying high in the sky on a broomstick with a little black cat by her side. But momma was a warlock, daddy was a mage, and nobody grew up to be a witch. She could have been a mage instead, maybe (the gods forbid) a priest, or maybe a mighty warrior who made her enemies tremble at her cry, but since she couldn't be a witch, she'd be a warlock like her momma.

For years she practiced her fel spells, mingling with the creepy crawly demons of the warlocky world. She studied her books, played with fire, all the while her height grew higher. Amongst the cackling of imps and the impatient stomps of fire-laden steeds little Sally Sue became a young adult.

One fall evening when Sally was grown, curiosity caught her eager mind. Down to the Undercity the Blood Elf did wander, for she had heard about the burning of a man; every Hallow's End the Forsaken set flame to the Wickerman. Night after night did they dance, celebrating their escape from something like a bad romance.

Pumpkins and candies and masks they did have, with dancing and hooting and hollering they burned that hay-shaped man. Not just Forsaken but Blood Elf and Tauren and Troll and a goblin too, all danced about half clad, what a crew. While searching high and low did Sally Sue, she hadn't found an Orc, not one amongst the early morning dew. It mattered not for the party had gone on all night, not a single person noticed nor knew.

Early that evening there rose such a clatter, a manic laughter, fel fire; everyone scattered from their tents to see what was the matter.

Above them all was am man on a horse, no head in sight; he cried out, making quite the scene:

"Here's my body, fit and pure! Now, your blackened souls I'll cure!"

While innocents scattered to the wind, the Headless Horseman did descend. Upon the crowd he unleashed his pumpkin horde while spells a plenty chased his hiney, left him sore.

"Harken, cur! Tis you I spurn! Now feel...the burn!"

The battle did wage but for a mere day, all kinds of spells leaving dead bodies in the way. But sunrise came, the Headless Horseman was dead. Now all that was missing, was his bitty pumpkin head.

Little Sally Sue, now grown and schooled, thought this situation peculiar, as if something was skewed. High and low she searched alone, thinking to find his head to bring him home.

Digging and searching all through the soil, moving rocks and pushing bushes did she toil. Finally amongst the muck there sat the Horseman's gourd, looking more than just a tad bit bored.

"Get over here you idiot, I have things to do!"

Instantly it was love at first scorn, "Quickly" he said "I must be reborn!"

So over to a cathedral she took the little shriveled head with the intentions of bringing the Horseman back from the dead. Upon a pedestal he was placed and Sally Sue said the words, eager to see him face to face.

"Horseman rise...
Your time is nigh...
You felt death once...
Now, never know demise!"

And rise he did at her cry; he grabbed a broom, handed it to her so she could fly.

"Come my new found love, let us soar. A holiday is upon us, it must not bore."

Together they rained terror from the clouds, pumpkins and shadow bolts soared down to the ground. With a mad laugh the Horseman did declare:

"Feast your eyes upon my witchy wife, she too brings you despair!"

Together they flew in destructive harmony, cackling and laughing and smiling with glee. On and on they went until the very last of the holiday.

To her he said: "I must go now, my time is spent. The day of the dead has come and I mustn't waste another moment, not one second. Until next year love I shall be away, but together we shall celebrate again on that day."

With that he was on his way, alone Sally Sue would wait for when the sky would turn red and the undead once again burnt that man of hay.


(Happy Hallow's End everyone!)

Monday, October 17, 2011

Through Your Interface - Day 9, Your Character's Hometown

I've been slacking, so have a Through Your Interface post.

We all have the same starting zones where we begin our various quests, but where does your character actually hail from?

I haven't been able to figure out a good hometown for all of my draenei folk, been too lazy to stalk out a home front for my humans (though you all may see something whenever I finally release the story about my warlock and rogue), my druid's hometown is still a mystery at large that I really don't want to spoil quite yet, and while I could in theory post a picture of Ironforge for my gnome mage, who a) cares about my gnome and 2) wants to see another pretty picture of Ironforge? So since I don't have anything at this moment that I can rightly explain to you all, I'm just going to post the following images and leave you all wondering wtf I'm going on about.


Friday, October 14, 2011

Fortune Fridays

They're quirky, they're fun, they're random Azerothian fortunes! Every Friday you will see a different fortune (either from our beloved Darkmoon Faire or the new fortune cards) featured here at World of Saz. Enjoy!

Fortune Card: You'll never know until you loot.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Hoarders: Azeroth Edition - Bitten By Frost

Happy Thursday hoarders! It's been a long while since I've done a publication of Hoarders: Azeroth Edition and I apologize for that. You see I've been on the hunt for several elusive somethings as of late, but we're not going to get into the details of that of that this week. Oh nononono...we're going to be covering another beast known as the Frostbitten achievement.


The last topic that Hoarders covered prior to Brewfest was Bloody Rare. The plan was to continue on with this rare theme and also cover Northrend's version, Frostbitten. Today my friends we follow through with this plan. Let's get on with the list, shall we?


First, you need some weapons.
 Addons
- Download NPCScan, fly over zones, profit. If a rare pops up on your screen (big noise, the screen will flash red) it will give you a little image of what it just saw, along with the name. If you click on that image (near the bottom of your screen, center) it will target the mob. Thanks to the handy-dandy new targeting system there should no longer be any crazy guess work with finding the mob.
- Download NPCScan Overylay, fly over the colored zones of the rares you have not killed yet, profit. Go into options and enable the ability to always track all mobs. If you accidently cache a mob (tamed hunter pets such as Nuramoc will do this even in cities such as Stormwind or Orgrimmar) and do not have this feature enabled, where a mob's patting area is located will be lost to you. Unless of course you have a super memory.
- Clear your NPCScan cache often! Directions are on the download page.

Tips and Tricks
- The last I knew rare spawns were tied to their own zones. This means that a rare spawning in Borean Tundra will not affect the spawns in Storm Peaks. There are theories claiming otherwise, but my gut tells me to stick with the theory that timers are attached to their own zones, not to each other.
- It is highly possible that more than one spawn can be up at a time per zone. It is also highly possible to have spawns happen within minute of each other. There have been reports done by a few people that claim to have seen Dirkee and Vyragosa up at the same time, so I assume that it is possible for it to happen in other zones as well.
- Most rares in Northrend have an independent spawn timer with the exception of Vyragosa and the Time-Lost Proto Drake, who are purposely tied to one another.
- It is possible that each zone has a rare spawn "cap", limiting the number of rares to pop in a zone to two. This is a theory of mine based on the fact that I haven't heard of more than two rare spawns being killed in a zone during a certain window (most spawn windows are 6-8 hours minimum).
- It is possible that many mobs can despawn after a given amount of time if left unkilled/tamed. I have no personal confirmations on this information,
- On occasion a hostile mob who patrols too closely to a town *may* get killed by NPCs. This is rare though, as far as rare events happening to rare mobs go.
- Group up and farm with a friend or two. Not only is it socially fun, but it allows you to cover more ground much more quickly. Time is money friend! It's also a killer.
- While it is by no means necessary, the faster the flying you have the better. Top of the line training + class/spec speed boosts + guild movement speed increases = a much quicker and smoother farm. As I said in the previous bullet, time is money and can make or break your kill.
- Don't just camp one place unless you're down to your last rare. Jump between spawn points of the rares that you need on a regular basis. If you do it one by one, you may call Outland home for ages.
- Take breaks! I know first hand how stressful and consuming rare hunting can be. You will go bloody bonkers if you don't take regular breaks. Do your best to only farm x amount of hours a day/week to prevent burn out and to save your precious sanity. Though if you're going for Bloody Rare and/or Frostbitten you may be half off your rocker anyways.

Yes, much of these tips/tricks are copied and pasted from the Bloody Rare post. I'm being a tad bit lazy, but I believe these tips to still be valid.


Now you need the knowledge.
Borean Tundra
Fumblub Gearwind
Old Crystalbark
Icehorn (tamable, does not keep his graphic)

Sholazar Basin
Loque'nahak (tamable)
Aotona (tamable)
King Krush (tamable)

Howling Fjord
Perobas the Bloodthirster
King Ping
Vigdis the War Maiden

Zul'Drak
Griegen
Zul'drak Sentinel
Terror Spinner (tamable)
*Gondria (tamable)

Grizzly Hills
Grocklar
Syreian the Bonecarver
Seething Hate
*Arcturis (tamable)

Dragonblight
Crazed Indu'le Survivor
Tukemuth
Scarlet Highlord Daion

Storm Peaks
Vyragosa (Shares a spawn timer and patrolling path with TLPD; only one will spawn.)
Dirkee
*Time-Lost Proto Drake (Shares a spawn timer and patrolling path with Vyragosa; only one will spawn.)
*Skoll (tamable)

Icecrown
Hildana Deathstealer
Putridus the Ancient (Huuuuuuge targeting range. I've had NPC Scan go off in Dalaran/Crystalsong Forrest and other areas far outside of his patrolling area.)
High Thane Jorfus

*Denotes notable rares that are not required for the Frostbitten achievement.

As I've said before and I'll say it again, these guys are called rares for a reason. While you may get lucky and get some of these on your first try, many of these rares will make you wait. Patience, the will power to keep going, and a touch of insanity will serve you well with working on this particular achievement.

Before you head out on your mission please button up your jackets and slip on your favorite pair of warm mitties. Whenever you finally return to the nice warm inn that you call home have yourself a cup of hot cocoa for a job well done. Happy hunting out there hoarders, and try not to get to frost bitten!

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Grind Baby Grind

I've really come to love participating in these shared topics from Blog Azeroth. There's nothing like a good prompt to get the creative juices flowing. This week's topic is brought to us by that one dang fool from Kallixta's Notes.

Normally the words "Best" and "Grind" are not found this close together and there are plenty of grinds to hate. However, I'm interested in the flip side:

Was there something that required sustained and prolonged effort that you found interesting or rewarding? Was there something that was not just a chore to work on?

I'm assuming most grinds are for Reputation, but maybe you have a novel definition?

I'll be quite frank here and fully admit that I do love me a good grind. No, not that sort of grind you pervs...well, maybe that too but that's not the subject at hand!

*Ahem*

For me there's two sorts of grinds in WoW: the "OMG I need a spork RIGHT FRIGGEN NOW so that I may gouge my eyes out." and the "Dude, I've had a hella rough day and I just want to mindlessly run in circles while killing some ogres. If you need me, leave a message with my secretary, Fabio. He'll relay them to me once I'm done here." Let me lay out some examples for you.

The type of grind that I absolutely cannot stand is the sort where you have no control over how fast or slow the pace is. The prime example for this would be the Argent Tournament. I could probably run off on a ranty tangent right about now and give you thirty different reasons as to why I hate the Argent Tournament, but the number one reason would be that...well, it just sucked, okay? You had to do this quest grind to open up that quest grind, which in turn eventually opened up this quest grind that granted you the seals. Once you were able to obtain seals you were essentially a slave to those *insert a line of explicit words here* quest givers until you were able to purchase every last good that you came to collect. For me it was all of the mounts, a tabard, and the pony bridle. Granted I took many breaks since the tourni came to town, but it was essentially over two bloody years before I managed to collect everything that I came for. It's a good thing I found good deals on the auction house for all those darn pets...

*Big deep breath in, slowly exhales.*

Now, the type of grind I love is one where I'm allowed to set the pace. Generally these grinds tend to be out-of-date reputation grinds but I suppose even fishing on occasion could fit into this category. A prime example of this would be the Kurenai reputation grind in Nagrand. I loved that grind so much that I did it not once, but twice. Why did I love it though, you wonder. For one it was quiet. It was fairly rare that I'd run into another reputation seeker or quester out on the western side of Nagrand, so I was left to kill ogres as I pleased with little to no interruption. For two, people rarely mess with you when you're on a mission. My guildies always new enough at the time that if I wasn't sitting in some city I was out working on getting new mounts; they usually didn't get between me and my mounts. Sure I'd get the occasional person asking me to invite their new alt in or whatever, but there wasn't any "Saz, let's run this!" "Saz, lead this raid." "MOOOOOM TIMMY ATE MY CANDY BAR." stuff to deal with. It was my quiet time to do as I pleased, and no one messed with it. Ultimately though the rhythm and pacing of gaining the Kurenai rep was such that it relaxed me, smacking multitudes of ogres upside the head with my axes was just an added stress reliever. It was redundant, predictable, and very much allowed me to clear my mind.

Now that you get the general idea on what I think is a good or bad grind, let's get to the actual question. Typically what I look for when I'm searching for the next ideal grind is one of or a combination of the following:

1. The pace must be able to be set by the participator, at least in part.
2. In the event that the participator cannot choose the pace in which the grind takes place, the quests locking said participator into a time frame must have some sort of comic relief to help enhance enjoyment of said grind.
3. The grind must have some sort of grand award at the end making the grind worth the effort. (Current viable gear is excluded from this category.)
4. While mental challenges are welcome on occasion, if the participator fails after multiple attempts even after consulting the Holy Reference Book of Azeroth (aka Wowhead), the grind has ceased being enjoyable. The participant must enjoy said challenge or must simply be able to finish their task in an efficient manner. To help alleviate this situation, please refer back to the second part of statement number 2.
5. I don't want no scrub, a scrub is a grind that can't get no love from me.

Saz's Grind Worthy Recommendations
- Oh My, Kurenai! Mounts, Achievement, Tabard
- Netherwing Mounts and DA BOOTERANG!! Okay, you can't keep the booterang, but maaaan is it fun to use. Prime example of comedic relief helping to break up the monotony of having to quest day after day.
- Wintersaber Trainers (new version) I'm not to familiar with the Horde's version of this line They Grow Up So Fast, but the quests for the Alliance to get exalted with the Wintersaber Trainers are completely adorable. Definitely worth the 20 days it takes to complete vs the 20 days of actual grinding you had to do, even post nerf of difficulty.
- Loremaster This is one of those grinds best done in pieces. Thanks to the new Cataclysm revamps you can do just that. Even if you're not one who typically likes questing, like myself, you may still find many of the new zones well worth your time.
- Scepter of the Shifting Sands Soooo, you can't do this quest line/grind anymore. My recommendation though is to get in good with Chromie and travel back in time. Seriously, it was that good.

The "Dude, don't grind that..." List
- Anything that has less than a 1% drop rate. Save your sanity and stop now.
- The Argent Tournament. Really...just...no.
- Bloody Rare/Frostbitten Sure, these are a bit easier to obtain than what they were a year or two ago, but still. Save your mind. Stay away from da voodoo.
- Don't sit around for 12+ hours waiting for a rare spawn. If you do, side effects include: sleepiness, nervous twitching, irritability, explosive nerd rage, A.D.D., involuntary noises, numb butt syndrome, starvation, and an excessive need to pee.
- The Insane It has this title for a reason people, beware.

Do I take my advice ever? Nay, which is all the more reason to balance out the bad grinds with the good. The bad grinds are necessary, even though they're painful. In a way they highlight just how good you had it when you were grinding x faction rep while you're pummeling your forehead with a crayon with faction rep y. Sometimes those crappy grinds yield great things though, giving us a sense of completion and elation that gives us a very positive release.

What was my point again with this closing? I haven't the slightest, my brain went straight into the gutter. Since I am now thoroughly brainless, I shall leave you with one final thought:

Any guild master, raid leader, parent, and/or average Joe knows that clearing one's mind is an absolute must from time to time.  Some people like to do that with a glass of wine, a hot bubble bath, maybe a bit of quiet music. Me? I like a nice, steady grind that will last me through the night...just so long as it doesn't go on too long. If it does, things start to hurt.

Friday, October 7, 2011

Fortune Fridays

They're quirky, they're fun, they're random Azerothian fortunes! Every Friday you will see a different fortune (either from our beloved Darkmoon Faire or the new fortune cards) featured here at World of Saz. Enjoy!

Fortune Card: Your outlook looks bright, unless you run into Deathwing.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Quest Dread in the Cataclysm

Blog Azeroth. Shared Topics. Topic by Oathblade. Let's do this!

"We all have the ones we hate to do. The quests that make us froth in rage to see their name in our quest log. So what quest do you hate above all others? If you can break down why its so horrible and rework it so it works."

I'll be quite frank, I'm not one who really cares for questing. I do it because I need to either level, unlock a faction, grind up a faction (oh how I loathe dailies), or because I got it into my pea-sized brain that I must have the Loremaster title regardless of the fact that I'm not so much a lore nerd as I am a hoarder of useless things. However, since the arrival of Cataclysm I have found myself questing a bit more than I had pre-zomg fire and dragons are destroying the world-ness. Zone redesigns, new interactive questing, and new achievements have tugged me outside of the safety of Stormwind into the wild woods of Azeroth. Curiosity, it's a weakness.

While sure, a good chunk of the new quests are still a bit grindy, the Cataclysm revamps have thankfully added a dash of humor here and there. For example let's look at Redridge. The storyline of John J. Keeshan is, well, badass. It brings in a certain flair to the zone that it had been missing previously. Sure there's still a lot of "Omg, I gotta kill how many orcs and murlocs?", which naturally cause your eyes to glaze over in boredom, but then Keeshan suddenly reappears onto the scene to spice things up. Needless to say, for the most part quest grinding has become a *little* more bearable for those of us who have short attention spans.

Regardless of the positive changes, the quests that I hate the most still unfortunately exist: escort quests and buggy vehicle quests. Let us start with escort quests, shall we?


Escort Rage
From the time that I attempted that damn turtle escort quest in Tanaris back when I was trying to level Saz to present day, I have loathed and tried to avoid any and all escort quests. I'm sure you're wondering why I'd do such a thing.

Well, for one I despise the fact that the NPCs can't even move at remotely the same speed you do. Normal "running on foot" speed is always too bloody fast, normal "RP walk" speed is too slow. The result? Your character looks like it's doing a jerky two step while he or she is taking the robotic chicken out for a walk.

Reason number two as to why I hate escort quests: the random mobs that pop out of no where plus the mobs on the pre-determined path that are completely unavoidable. Alright, as a level 85 who is going back to lowbie areas to quest this really isn't an issue anymore. While this isn't really so much an issue for me, I'm thinking of the "children" of Azeroth. Please recall that my anger issues towards escort quests stems from that one turtle escort situation that went down in Tanaris all those many years ago. I so desperately wanted to help out Mr. Tortoise get back to his wife, I really did. It broke my heart that these two were separated and I wanted to help them find each other once again (please note, I took quests much more seriously back then...the story about little Pamela in the Eastern Plaguelands disturbed me so much that I refused to quest in the area anymore and resorted to getting lost in the buggy dens of Silithus). Even though there was two of us on the quest, we couldn't defend/keep Mr. Tortoise close enough to us to ever complete the escort.

I'm sorry for failing you all those years ago, Mr. Tortoise, I really am. I was more noobish than your average noob, as was the druid who was with me. I really hope that you managed to find your wife on your own.


Let's Blow Things Up
Now we get to a really fun mechanic that Blizzard has implemented into the game that I absolutely hate some days: vehicle quests.

I'll be honest, I think many of the vehicle quests are pretty neat. I mean, I swing axes all day long; any chance I get to rest my arms and run people over with a tank instead is fine by me. The downside to vehicle quests? They're often clunky (siege engines, I'm looking at your turn radius...) and unfortunately riddled with either functional or UI bugs.

Hopping into a siege engine Wintergrasp was a blast. Not being able to bail out of said siege engine when you needed to was not. Getting a vehicle quest where you need to run over a bunch of baddies with a tank, mondo fun. Not being able to navigate around that tree stump and getting yourself hung up on it with no escape, kind of a pisser. Finding an epically hilarious character who pulls you onto the back of his horse so that you may pelt rocks and armor at a giant freaking dinosaur, so much epic potential. Having the bastard bug out and only give you pebbles to chuck at previously mentioned dinosaur, thirteen minutes of absolute boredom.

I love the fact that Blizzard thought outside of the box and gave us vehicle battles, quests, and mounts. Really, I do. I hate how so many of those vehicles are still buggier than a forgotten fast food garbage bin after so much time.


Needless to say, slow-poke escorts and buggy vehicles tend to really grind my gears.